Feeling moody? Maybe it’s the weather

[photo courtesy James Jordan]

The brain is a complicated muscle, but one we’re learning more about all the time. Most people aren’t adversely affected by the changes in the weather as summer draws to a close, whilst some feel moody, drained and depressed with the arrival of cold winds and gray skies.

In the news recently the results of research was announced that identified a biological reason why two million people in the UK suffer from seasonal affective disorder.

Scientists from the Centre of Addiction and Mental Health in Toronto, Canada, conducted brain scans of 88 adults. They discovered that those who experienced low moods and depression in winter had a higher level of a specific protein than those who were unaffected by seasonal changes.

It’s believed that the identified protein soaks up serotonin (feel good chemical) in the brain, causing an adverse effect on people’s mood. It’s long been known that depression is accompanied by low serotonin levels, so the research further emphasises how important a healthy mind and body are for your sense of well being.

With anxiety being such a complicated and deep rooted issue I’d suggest that other factors are probably at play along with the higher levels of a certain protein. However, the fact that scientists are now able to identify some of the biological reasons why the brain behaves in a certain way emphasises the strides being made in understanding anxiety in all its forms.

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Originally posted 2008-09-02 16:26:53. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

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Coping with Criticism if You Suffer from Socially Anxiety Disorder

Social anxiety disorder is rooted in the chronic fear of being negatively judged or insulted. If you’re suffering from the low self esteem that partners social phobia then criticism always seems spiteful and upsetting because it triggers your self punishing, painful thoughts.

However, there shouldn’t be any reason for you to live in chronic fear of barbed comments if you can teach yourself how to respond objectively, and even be able to disarm insults like a master swordsman when they occur.

The isolation brought upon by social anxiety is normally partnered by depression and low self esteem. When you’re feeling rotten and worthless your thought patterns and emotions are shrouded in gloom by the black clouds that follow you around. This means that whenever anybody says anything degrading you’re likely to exaggerate its significance, take it to heart and incorrectly think it means you’re a worthless person.

How cognitive behavioural therapy can help

Thinking negatively and exaggerating the significance of the things people say is a thinking error brought upon by your depression, which prevents you from interpreting what people say in a realistic, objective manner.

Cognitive behavioural therapy teaches you how to identify the negative beliefs and thinking errors that make you get upset whenever you’re criticised. You can then learn to recognise unhelpful thinking errors when they occur and replace them with more positive, realistic thoughts.

This obviously sounds a lot easier said than done, and it can take many months to start changing the way you automatically think and feel. However, it has been clinically proven that it can be done, and CBT provides you with a goal orientated framework for overcoming your social anxiety a step at a time.

Once you’re able to assess the things people say more objectively you’ll then be able to apply a more logical approach to criticism and not take it so personally.

Learn how to interpret comments objectively

If there is an element of truth to someone’s comments then you should use it as an opportunity to learn about your mistakes and how you can correct your behaviour. You’re only human after all and will always make mistakes from time to time. And because you’re human you also constantly developing, so criticism can sometimes give you a few pointers to show you how to grow as a person.

On the other hand, if after assessing criticism objectively you think somebody is just being rude or insulting then their comments shouldn’t have the power to upset you. Why should you feel hurt or devalued because of somebody else’s mistake in judgement?

Remember that it’s not the things people say that can make you feel upset – it’s how you interpret them.

How to handle insults

In Dr David D. Burns’ ‘Feeling Good’ (a global bestseller which has shifted over three million copies) he teaches an ‘empathy and disarming’ technique for responding to insults without hurling them back or running home to hide under your bed covers.

Firstly, you have to emphasise with your attacker – objectively assess why they are attacking you. What is the basis for their barbed comments?

By listening and asking for clarification on why they are being insulting, you can calm them down by letting them know that you are listening and can prevent the situation escalating into full scale warfare.

Using empathy is an opportunity to understand if there is any basis to the insults, or if the attacker is just being offensive.

The next stage is to use the ‘disarming technique’ to defuse the situation without losing your temper or losing face. Simply find a way to agree with an aspect of what your attacker is saying, whether you believe it or not, and that way you can disarm their barbed thrusts with the skill of musketeer:

Attacker: ‘You’re a loser.”

You: “Well, I certainly make mistakes sometimes and I’m not the greatest sportsman. There’s certainly areas in which I could improve, but doesn’t everybody.”

Attacker: “You’re a skinny, stupid waster with nothing to offer anybody.”

You: “Yes I could certainly do with putting on some weight, I’m not going to be the world’s next Einstein and I could certainly apply myself better. But I have skills in other areas, just as everybody does, and I have lots to offer the people around me.”

By agreeing, if only partially, with their line of attack you simply take the air out of their sails and divert them from the collision course you’d be heading for if you were to fight fire with fire.

You feel the way that you think, so learn to change your negative thoughts

Being able to identify your positive attributes, rather than kick yourself over your weaknesses, is another skill taught by cognitive behavioural therapy, and is useful in being able to respond objectively to criticism and not take what people say to heart.

The key is to be able to react based on facts, rather than let disagreements deteriorate into name calling or a humiliating retreat.

With practice in learning how to respond in a more realistic, objective manner, you’ll find that the risk of criticism will no longer seem so terrifying, and your social anxiety will recede as a result.

Photo courtesy of Nika

Originally posted 2008-04-21 15:23:28. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

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Think you’re lazy? Here’s how to be more active to combat social anxiety disorder

[Photo courtesy of Ingorrr]

One of the (many) problems with social anxiety disorder is that it can affect your motivation to get out there and do things. The fear of negative evaluation by others might mean you prefer the safety of your bed, rather than face (usually misinterpreted) stares of disapproval.

However, human beings by nature need to be stimulated. And avoiding activities will simply make you feel worse rather than better. Being isolated can make you feel depressed. So the best antidote to changing the way you feel is to change the way you think and behave.

If you lie in bed all day waiting for the motivation/desire/energy to do something then you’ll be waiting a longtime. Instead you’ll find that doing literally anything other than nothing will raise your mood, boost your confidence and give you the drive to be more active.

Why am I so lazy?

First of all, don’t make the mistake of ‘labelling’ yourself ‘lazy’. As a human being you’re too complicated to define yourself by a single word or phrases. You might be lazy ‘sometimes’. But that doesn’t mean you have some sort of genetic imprint that prevents you from getting dressed and doing stuff.

Here are a few of the common excuses (particularly if you suffer from social anxiety disorder) that might pop into your head to avoid getting stuff done:

• ‘I don’t feel like it’ – it’s a myth to think that you have to wait to ‘feel’ like doing something before you can do it. It’s only after experiencing the rewards of achieving something that you’ll find the motivation to do more. Even little things, like cooking yourself dinner rather than eating dry toast, will improve your mood because of the beneficial outcome from your activity.

• ‘I’m too depressed’ – you feel the way that you think. So if you lie in bed all day staring at the ceiling tormenting yourself over your latest (perceived) social faux pas then you’re not going to feel like going on a 10k bike ride. The best way of fighting your depression is to change the way you think. Being active and pursuing fulfilling goals, whether it’s teaching yourself Spanish or learning to cook, is what will banish the black clouds in the long run.

• ‘I might fail’ – So what? Nobody is good at everything. And we all have our strengths and weaknesses in life. Thinking you shouldn’t play tennis or attend a job interview because you might not get the outcome you want is only going to be a self fulfilling prophesy. To get better at things you have to practice. And there are enough hobbies, sports and jobs out there for you to find one you get satisfaction from.

Remember that thinking you must win at something or must get the job is a rigid way of looking at things. You should give yourself some flexibility and have preferences for the outcomes you’d like rather than rigid success/failure demands.

So how do I get myself out of bed and combat social anxiety disorder?

A tried and tested method of beating the bedridden blues is taught by Dr David Burns in ‘Feeling Good’. He suggests writing out a time table for what you’d like to get done each day.

This can include the minor things, such as getting dressed and reading the paper, right up to shopping or attending a dinner party. At the end of the day you then rate out of five the satisfaction you found in the completion of each task. The easier tasks might only rate as a one, but the more demanding challenges could rate as a four or five.

What you should find is that the sense of accomplishment you get from scoring your activity each day will drive you to do more. Having a schedule also helps you to structure your time and keep yourself occupied.

Gradually, you should also find that you start pushing yourself to keep improving your score and pursuing ever more demanding tasks.

The list of things you could do is limitless. But here are a few ideas:

• Learn a new musical instrument


• Learn a new language


• Read a book (I’d highly recommend ‘Feeling Good’)


• Take up jogging (exercise is a great anxiety reliever)


• Start an eBay shop for some extra cash


• Decorate your bedroom to create a bright, warm atmosphere


• Learn to cook spicy Thai dishes


• Start writing a blog (doing something creative is always recommended for providing an outlet for expressing your social anxiety disorder)


• Practice meditating (also recommended for anxiety treatment)

So, if you’re currently lying in bed, feeling glum and reading this on your laptop – start writing a list of all the active things you could be doing.

Remember that you feel the way that you think. So start giving yourself a daily dose of uplifting brainwaves from pursuing fulfilling goals, and banish the bedridden blues for good.

[Photo courtesy of SqueakyMarmot]

Originally posted 2008-06-26 18:38:10. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

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UK School Kids Given Lessons on How to Be Happy

You feel the way that you think, and now UK school children are being taught how to think more positively to help them cope with the stresses of teenage life. Initially, 1500 11-year olds from 22 schools are being given lessons on how to assess situations objectively, how to be assertive and many other skills that can help them cope better with emotionally difficult situations. If the scheme is a success then it could be expanded into class rooms on a national scale.

The scheme uses lessons taught in the USA by the Penn Resiliency Program, based in Philadelphia, which adopts tried and tested cognitive behavioural therapy techniques to ‘detect inaccurate thoughts, to evaluate the accuracy of those thoughts, and to challenge negative beliefs by considering alternative interpretations’.

Teaching children cognitive behavioural therapy could help them avoid problems later on in life

Whilst some might remember their school days with fond memories, childhood can be a difficult period because of peer pressure, the desire to fit in and having to cope with all the struggles of teenage life.

Psychotherapists believe that it’s during childhood that you form your belief system: opinions on yourself, other people and the world around you. Upsetting childhood experiences, such as being neglected or bullied, can lead to problems later on in life because of the negative associations you attach to similar situations.

So equipping impressionable school children with the skills to identify inaccurate, unhelpful thoughts and then to replace them with healthier, happier ways of thinking could prove invaluable in helping them grow into secure, confident adults.

Treatment for anxiety and depression is a global issue

In a 2006 international survey UK children ranked bottom for happiness and well being. Some blame celebrity culture, with its focus on money and possessions, for giving children an unhelpful value system (although the problem is far more complicated than a single root cause). However, teaching them how to feel confident and secure, without needing the latest designer clobber or the approval of others, could be coming at just the right time.

Awareness on the effectiveness of cognitive behavioural therapy, for treating anxiety and depression, is spreading all the time. The UK’s ‘happiness tsar’ Professor Richard Layard even believes it could help people living on benefits to get back to work.

With depression the world’s biggest mental health problem, teaching more people cognitive behavioural therapy (whether self taught, with a therapist or in a group) could make a positive impact on not just on the lives of children but society in general.

Originally posted 2008-09-08 17:02:59. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

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Social Anxiety Associated with Parkinsons disease

Social Phobia is recurrent in people diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease. This is according to a recent study conducted at Erenkoy Research and Training Hospital for Neurologic and Psychiatric Disorders in Istanbul, Turkey. The study involved 80 patients diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease admitted to the Parkinson’s disease and Movement disorders Clinic. The result was that among the 80 patients 42.5% were diagnosed with social anxiety, of which 20 of the patients had depression, 18 had generalized anxiety disorder, and 6 patients had a panic disorder. A logistic regression analysis was also done and revealed that social phobia is more frequent in males with high Levodopa daily dosage, early-onset PD and the presence of postural instability.

Social Anxiety is more common in women who are twice as likely to suffer from social phobia and panic disorder compared with men, this is according to Harvard Health Publication. Men, however, are more prone to Parkinson’s disease than women, this was supported in American Journal of Epidemiology. Which is why it is baffling to know that social anxiety is more prevalent to male patients with Parkinson’s disease. Moreover, I have found out that there is a current issue of whether antiparkinsonian medications might be the one reason for some of the anxiety manifestation present in Parkinson’s disease patients. But of course these issues with antiparkinsonian medications have yet to be proven.

At the moment there is no present cure for Parkinson’s disease. Treatments are available to alleviate the symptoms and be able to maintain the quality of life with PD patients. The treatments include Physiotherapy, occupational therapy, speech and language therapy, medication and surgery. However, the researchers think that these current studies linking social anxiety with Parkinson’s disease may provide an edge for early detection and treatment of Parkinson’s disease and improving the quality of life of the patients.

Originally posted 2014-07-31 10:36:41. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

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Why Negotiation is Like a Dance

[Picture courtesy of a4gpa]

Following on from previous articles, in which I discussed assertiveness and how to say ‘no’, I’m now going to discuss why you should add negotiation to your growing list of skills. As with overcoming many of the symptoms of social anxiety, negotiation is about maintaining a balance between being fair to yourself and fair to others.

Learn how to change your steps

Social interaction is like an intricate dance. When people want you to think or behave in a certain way they’ll perform steps, using persuasive language and gestures, for you to follow.

If you suffer from social anxiety then you probably fall in the trap of either being too passive, and obediently following their lead, or too aggressive, and refusing to dance altogether.

Being too passive or aggressive are not helpful modes of behaviour. If you’re infected with the ‘disease to please’ then people will take you for granted and might push you around. Whilst getting mad makes it difficult to think and behave logically, hampering your ability to persuade people why they should respect your opinions and priorities.

Learning to negotiate is about learning to nimbly change your dance steps so that you can prompt others to change theirs and have more control over your interactions.

It’s not about winning or losing

Social anxiety is driven by thinking errors that result from low self esteem and negative thinking. One of the common thinking errors is ‘all or nothing’ in which you believe that you and others must behave in a certain way. So if you have a disagreement with someone and want them to change their mind you think that you must persuade them to meet your demands or they’ve won.

It’s a mistake to think that life is about winning or losing. This extreme, inflexible approach is unhelpful and unrealistic. Demanding that other people should always fit in with your priorities, such as agreeing to immediately perform a task for you at work or walk your dog when you’re on holiday, is only going to lead to stress and frustration when people don’t meet your unrealistic expectations.

Instead of making demands that people must fit in with what you want, you should offer some leeway and be prepared to negotiate.

Successful negotiation is about being fair to yourself and fair to others in finding a solution in which you can both, at least partially, get what you want. Finding a balanced agreement is the constructive approach, rather than getting angry or frustrated from thinking that you have to get the better of the other person.

Try asking work colleagues what other priorities they have to attend to before they can perform your task, or arrange to split the dog walking with another neighbour.

Negotiation is finding a solution in which you both gain

When you enter into negotiation, whether it’s with work colleagues or friends, don’t try to get what you want by being aggressive, manipulative or demanding. Instead approach it as an intricate dance in which you’re trying to influence the outcome, but are also prepared to change your own steps to compliment your partner.

Negotiation is about finding a solution in which you both can gain, rather than an ugly confrontation in which you must either win or lose.

Originally posted 2008-05-19 12:37:16. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

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6 Ways to Overcome Social Anxiety Naturally

How is social anxiety affecting your life right now? Are there ways to overcome social anxiety naturally?

According to Dr. Justin Weeks, the assistant professor of Psychology and director of the Center for Evaluation and Treatment of Anxiety at Ohio University, “Shyness and social anxiety disorder are all part of one continuum and it’s only a question of severity.”

This is certainly true. Social anxiety varies extensively in severity between different people. So how seriously is it impacting your life? Does it hinder you to reach your goals and live a fulfilling life?

If the answer is “Yes” then maybe you need to do something before its too late.

I regarded myself as a victim of social anxiety disorder and regretted every wrong decision I made in my high school and college days as a student. I was too worried to approach my teacher just to ask clarifications on my grades, I skip classes because my teacher asks me to speak in front of the class, which is my most dreadful thing to do back then. I always wish I have a life coach to motivate me and push me to face my fears and conquer my limits.

However, if you don’t have a life coach and are experiencing the same thing then you can try the following ways suggested by Weeks, to overcome your social anxiety naturally.

1. Try some self-help manual

Self-help manuals are aimed to supplement therapy sessions, but they are also good means for working things out on your own, said Weeks. One of the manual that he suggested is the “Managing Social Anxiety” workbook. which is proven to be effective on cognitive-behavioral therapy. The workbook contains all the tools necessary to help patients manage their anxiety and improve their quality of life.

2. Work with your therapist

When social anxiety is stopping you from doing things that can improve your quality of life and have not been successful in self-help then maybe it’s time to seek for a professional help. Find a therapist who is eligible to handle your case and specializes in anxiety disorders.

3. Practice deep breathing technique

Weeks suggest practicing deep breathing technique everyday until it became a habit. Deep breathing exercises are very beneficial before an anxiety-provoking social situation. Because the breath can be used to directly influence the stressful changes causing a direct stimulation of the parasympathetic nervous system stimulation of the sympathetic nervous system.

4. Create an exposure hierarchy

An exposure hierarchy is a list – akin to a ladder – where you write down situations that cause you anxiety, in order of severity. Then you perform the easiest behavior, and keep moving up the list.

To create your own hierarchy, list 10 anxiety-provoking situations, and rate them on a 100-point scale (zero being no anxiety; 100 being severe anxiety). Your list might start with asking a stranger for directions and end with joining Toastmasters.

Try visiting global.oup.com that can link you to various worksheets on coping with social anxiety, and includes “the fear and avoidance hierarchy.” (Look for “managing social anxiety: workbook.”)

5. Create objective goals

One of Weeks recommendation is to devise objective goals. In view of the fact that people tend to disqualify the positive when they feel anxious, when they might do well even great, but because of their anxious feelings, they see their performance as appalling.

Focus on achieving on your objective goals rather than the reactions that you are going to get from the people around you. It is a good technique to create these objective goals that set as a barometer for judging your progress. “You did what you wanted to in a situation. We can’t control what another person is going to do.” Said Weeks.

6. Keep a rational outlook

Dispute both bleak thoughts that undermine your performance and fuel your anxiety, and equally unrealistic thoughts that are irrationally positive, Weeks said. If you are giving a speech, you might initially think that you would do poorly. But if you have given speeches before this is not a rational or realistic perspective. You might say instead, “I’ve given speeches before. I’m prepared, and I’ll give it my best shot”.

As what Weeks said, if social anxiety is sabotaging your goals and stopping you from living the life you want seek help and try the above techniques and recommendations. Social anxiety is highly treatable, and there are many ways you can treat social anxiety naturally.

At the core, it takes a lot of patience, persistence and a determination to get better and grow in the process.

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